Stand Up and Embrace our Differences

Marcus Aurelius once said, “You always own the option of having no opinion. There is never any need to get worked up or to trouble your soul about things you can’t control.  These things are not asking to be judged by you.  Leave them alone.”

What a powerful insight this man had.  My favorite book, probably my top three favorites ever, is Marcus Aurelius - The Emperor’s Handbook by C. Scot Hicks and David V. Hicks.  It is a new translation of the Meditations which is a combination of the notes of the emperor intended for personal and private use.  I find many wonderful thoughts in these pages and often use it as a platform for writing some of my own meditations.

Recent cultural news events have led thousands of people to take a stand for what they believe in. For the things that they feel are important and just and holy.  Which side is wrong?  We all have our opinion and not everyone can be right.  At times I wonder if ANY of us are right.  Perhaps we have all missed the mark.  Perhaps we could heed some of the emperor’s advice and leave things alone. 

Humanity lacks the ability to do that.  You know the type of people who actually look for confrontation, right?  They seem to look and listen for an opportunity to voice their opinions and typically will do so in total disregard for the people on the other side.  And when pushed, most of us will take a side because our hearts tell us to.  That is part of the human experience – we all approach ideas and topics from a different place.  The challenge is that when our lines cross, do we clash and fight or do we embrace one another, celebrate the mere fact that we have differences, and strive to learn from one another. 

The real question our culture needs to answer is this:  how do we stand up for what we believe in without standing on top of those we oppose?  Is it possible for humanity to agree to disagree and do so in peacefulness, showing love towards one another in all things?  Colossians 3:14 tells us that love is the perfect binding agent for unity.

You recall I Corinthians 12:2-3 which, interestingly enough is a popular wedding scripture.  It tells us that even if we speak many languages and we seem to be able to transcend humanity and share the language of the angels with one another, if we do not have love, than we might as well be clanging a noisy cymbal.  In fact, we could have so much faith that we can, indeed, move mountains but if we have not love, we are absolutely nothing.

Here’s the point I’m trying make.  Enter all things that you do and say with an attitude of love for ALL people, regardless of their viewpoint.  Just because they don’t sound like you does not mean that they are asking to be judged by you.  By speaking in love and sharing with one another our convictions, as long as we continue to show and have love in our hearts, we will all find the truth.

We are different and we all have our strong opinions.  Some of us can be swayed from one side of the issue to another.  Some will never be swayed.  And that is what we need to accept and embrace about humanity.  We are not going to agree with one another but is it possible for all of us to recognize that ALL have fallen short of the grace of God?  Is it possible that we leave well enough alone those things that are out of our control and instead to simply reach across the table, the picket line, the street, the pew – and tell the person that looks different than we are that we love them?  Is it possible that love actually can be the bonding agent that brings unity to the human race?

Come to the Water and Drink

Water.  We bathe in it, we drink it, cook with it, clean with it, play in it, boat on, swim in it, dive in to it…water is so simple yet so versatile and powerful. 

Water is a polar molecule.  It is one of the strongest solvents on earth because it dissolves more than almost any other compound does.  It can stick to things and it can transport itself up small tubes such as plant and tree roots.  The surface tension is high so things float.   Water is so common that we often take it for granted like the air we breathe.

In John 4:1-14 we see an example of how God takes the common and turns them in to something special.  Jacob built a well for water that was used to help sustain life.  1800 years later Christ was seated at that well and used it to transform lives.  He broke barriers with this simple well.  As you may recall Jesus sat at the well where a Samaritan woman was drawing water and he asked her for a drink of it.  She recognized Christ as a Jew and she being a Samaritan woman knew it was not right for Jews to associate with Samaritans or even use the same dishes therefore it was not possible for her to be asked this. 

It wasn’t important to Christ from what community, what body of believers, or what class of people this woman came.  Jesus was merely trying to illustrate to the woman that God is the Living Water from where all our sustenance comes.   I’m pretty sure that Christ was thirsty.  As we all are – we thirst for water and we thirst for the taste of the Holy.  But Christ used it for a Holy opportunity.

She didn’t get it at first.  She wanted this water that Christ was talking about that gave life eternal.  She thought she was just talking to a man next to a well but it was just a hole in the ground and she was talking with the well that offers the water of life.

Christ was not only thirsty for water but he also took this opportunity to use water as a symbol of the life that He offers us.  You see – it is very possible for us to witness some very holy moments in the most common of places.  As we transcend boundaries of status, life, background, history, orientation, and even religious varieties – we then can truly taste the water that Christ offers us.  When we build up fences around the well and demand that only those who look and act like we do can take from it, we have missed the point.

The point of this story is that all people matter to Christ.  Why did he choose to go through Samaria on his journey?  As a result, the town of Sychar got to hear about Christ.  Christ went out of his way to meet just one person.  And he still makes those journeys today.

He came to give us living water and for it to be like a stream within us reaching out to others.  The world is full of people who need it but Christ could do nothing for people who did not know this.  Some people think they are good enough and will not confess their wrongdoings but the woman at the well did so – she admitted she was not worthy and in that simple act Christ said she would be made worthy through the living, healing waters that is Christ Jesus.

Come to the water – drink and be filled. 

It's All Your Fault, Mr Fleming

I have always loved writing.  When I was younger I kept journals and was constantly trying to come up with something to write about.  I wrote poetry and stories and sometimes I would even write pretend news columns for the local paper – complete with left justified margins (handwriting it!).  My father had an old smith-corona manual type writer and I would ask to use it every chance I got.  I learned home row and was able to type without seeing the keys in no time.  I’ve never professed to be an scholarly writer by any stretch of the imagination.  My writing tends to be more random-streams-of-consciousness writing.  But it’s been a passion of mine for some time.

I had a high school teacher encourage me to write – in fact, he demanded it.  He gave me an assignment that no one else knew about.  He asked me to write about anything I wanted but I had to do it once a week and hand it in to him.  I did.  And every comment he wrote on that paper was encouraging.  Even his manner of correcting me was always so encouraging.  I’m blessed to remember his name – Mr Fleming.  I’m blessed as well to be in touch with his daughter and one of my high school classmates to this day.  Mr Fleming went to be with our Lord several years ago but his powerful teaching extends farther than he could have imagined.

1 Thessalonians 5:11 says “Encourage one another, and build each other up.”  That’s exactly what Mr Fleming did to all of his students – he encouraged us and built us up.   The building up and encouragement of this man went far beyond my writing but has permeated many aspects of my life and fuels my decision making.  I never had the opportunity to let him know how much I appreciated it but I would like to think he had an idea.  For when we build up one another, we build up ourselves as well. The body of Christ must encourage one another; cheer one another on to be the best we can be in the areas in which we excel. 

You see, through the kindness of this one man, a seed was planted.  And over time that seed continued to grow and is now an integral part of who I am. 

We have the privilege to encourage one another and to sow seeds in one another’s heart that God will nurture and allow to grow.  And all it takes is an encouraging word.

Our Caregivers Role Model

All four Gospel writers mention the account of Jesus and his disciples entering the Garden of Gethsemane.  While he is there he asks Peter, James and John to go with him while he prays.  Jesus steps further away from the three disciples to spend time in prayer.

This account shows us God’s Constant Providence.  In this moment Christ experiences agony and a trouble state of mind.  What could have possibly been surging through the mind of this man at this moment?  I want to use this account as a powerful image for us.  What if – for the sake of argument – as Christ has knowledge of his betrayal this is literally right around the corner; what if Christ went off by himself because he grew tired of caregiving?  If He came to be truly human and to have a true experience of what it is to fully embrace the human experience than surely Christ must have grown weary of all the caregiving that he dished out, all the teaching, all the love and now he is in full realization of the truth he’s known all along:  he will die for it?  He gets murdered.  He gets sacrificed.  He even pleads to His Father in heaven that if it were a possibility, please intervene and change your divine plan so that this incident can pass right over me and I can continue moving forward and living. 

It is not possible for us to try and get in to the mind of Christ without having feelings of resentment or anger towards humanity.  All his work must have felt to him, at times, to be all in vain.  The internal conflict Christ experienced was surely agonizing because he knew what he had to do and he knew what the outcome would be. 

I have had my share of care giving.  It started almost 15 years ago while I began care giving for an elderly family member.  I watched as all the love and care was dished out for this person yet hardly a word of thanks or act of appreciation was ever received.  The reward of care giving is typically not one that comes from the patient.  It is, indeed, a divine and intrinsic reward.  But we are human.  We want affection and affirmation.  We need people to tell us we’re OK, we’re doing well, we’re doing right.  But even those words can sound and feel so empty when they aren’t supported by actions.

Caregivers live daily with a myriad of emotions.

ANXIETY AND WORRY  Never having complete confidence that you are handling everything exactly right.  Worrying what will happen to the one you are caring for if something happens to you and then there’s the future and what it will bring as the illness progresses.  Are you really doing everything you possibly can do to help this person.

ANGER OR RESENTMENT

Anger at the world and resentful of others who do not have the responsibilities that you have; at times being angry at the very person you are caring for because you have dropped everything for this person.  This leads to grief.

GRIEF  Long before the patient may pass away the feelings of grief are there.  We mourn the daily loss of this person as they fall deeper and deeper in to an unknown abyss.  We mourn the loss of ourselves, our identity and our very purpose.  Our hopes and dreams have been put on hold and many may be lost forever.  We mourn the loss of time, vacations, relaxation, lovers and dreams.  And then you feel guilty.

GUILT.  The guilt is strong.  Again, are we really doing all that we can?  Will my loved ones around me forgive me for being absent so much, or tired, or cranky or short of patience?  We find ourselves lacking patience with the one we’re caring for and then we struggle over the acceptance of our role.

I am confident that Christ has felt these emotions as we all have.  How Christ handled them and lived through these emotions is an important lesson to us especially as caregivers. 

Christ prayed.  He rebuked those who were wrong and lovingly corrected injustices.  He stood strong for his convictions and stood up for those who could not do it for themselves. 

If you are a caregiver I want to encourage you first by reminding you that you are not alone although this journey feels very dark and lonely.  And although you have no doubt heard it before, you truly do need to make sure you are caring for yourself.  I encourage you to check out this website that has some helpful tips.  http://www.beliefnet.com/Health/2008/09/Tips-for-Caregivers.aspx  The Mayo Clinic also has some great tips and tools for stress management at http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/caregiver-stress/MY01231/

Look – as Christ entered the garden he knew what he was facing and yet even he cried out to God  to please reconsider who he has chosen for this job.  We are not alone and we have the most influential caregiver ever as our role model, our mentor, and our guide.  Take time to pray not only for the ones in your charge but for your needs to be fulfilled.  Let God know how you feel so he knows you are in agreement.  God knows how you feel but many times He just wants you to let him know. 

God bless your care giving efforts no matter what capacity it is either part-time, occasional or full-time and all-consuming. 

Praise the Lord, Oh My Soul

We read and hear the stories about God's hand in the lives of the saints that came before us.  We see his goodness in delivering them, his mercy in pardoning them, and his faithfulness in keeping his promise with them.  how much more interesting would it be for us to comment and share how the hand of God is in our own lives today?  what if we were to look back upon our own, personal history and see that ours is at least as full of God, as full of goodness and truth and faithfulness and mercy as the lives of any of the saints who have gone before us?


What injustice do we bring to the Kingdom when we assume that God has only imparted his mighty acts and showed himself strong to only those who went before us?  Does God not role up his sleeves and bare his arms on our behalf even today? 


Review the history of your life.  Look closely and discover those blessed events that were refreshing to us and that glorified the Kingdom of God.

Can you truly say you have never been delivered from a wilderness that your life journey led you to?  Have you passed through any raging waters unsupported by the divine?  Have you walked through no fires unharmed?  Have you had no manifestations at all of God's divine nature?  Have you had no encouter with the Holy during your life journey thus far?  The same God that gave Solomon the desire of his heart - has he not listened to you and answered that which you asked?  David sang, "who satisifies the mouth with good things".  Has God not satisfied you and supplied you with your basic needs from His bounty?  Have you never walked by the still waters? 
Surely the goodness of the Lord who blessed the saints before us is continuing to bless those among us and our own lives? 


May we take time today to weave his mercies given to us in great abundance in to a glorious song for God.  May we take the gold of thanksgiving and the jewels of praise and fasten yet another amazing crown to adore the head of Christ.

Let us praise the Lord for all his mercies and forget not all his benefits! May we be able to rejoice with true authentic hearts and count his blessings and mercies seen in and through our lives.  God is alive today and working in, through and around us just as He did in the lives and hearts of all the saints that have gone before us.  Praise the Lord, Oh my Soul. 

Wisdom Charging

In his book, “Reaching Out”, Henri Nouwen wrote, “Hospitality, therefore, means primarily the creation of a free space where the stranger can enter and become a friend instead of an enemy.  Hospitality is not to change people, but to offer them space where change can take place.”  Chaplain Brent Janke, clergy for Aurora Hospital in Grafton, Wisconsin, has this placed on the wall in the chapel of this hospital.   He goes on to say that it is his “hope…that this place would be a free, open, inviting space…”  He invited people to come to take a moment, in their comfortable space and understanding, to regroup and recharge.

One of my dearest friends, I’ll call him Jai to remain anonymous, will sometimes suddenly proclaim he needs his battery recharged.  He is typically talking about his energy levels and the fact that he needs food to recharge.  But how wonderful would it be if we could recognize, before we spiritually starve, our need to recharge our spirit-battery?  To take a quick moment to plug in to our spiritual outlet, feel the surge of the spirit coursing through our  veins, and walk away lifted just a little bit higher than when we arrived; is what we call a gift of grace!

As you walk in to your personal space, feel the hospitality of the Spirit.  Allow the free space to be welcoming to your tired feet, and your rushing mind.  Take some time today – perhaps in the oddest and most unsuspected place, to stop and plug in…recharge…refocus…refresh…and regroup.

Creating God, you have provided us with so many opportunities to take a quick stop.  Forgive us when we allow our spirit-battery to fail before recharging takes place.  Send your Spirit to dwell within us to bring us comfort and peace.  Amen.

"Fixing" What God Has Created?

As a pastor and a crisis intervention counselor, I have spent endless hours walking people through a variety of journeys.  They are too various to name because each one is an intimate experience that is unique to one individual.  It matters not if I agree with them, what matters is that I walk with them.  What matters is that together we seek peace, grace and truth. 

I have been challenged lately to make a statement on some of the hotter topics of our day.  Paul was no doubt pressured to make commentary on his day and the topics that were all the talk back then.  I try to stay away from the political scene because, well, I’m never exactly right on any topic.  As the title of my blog suggests, I’m merely wandering around on this planet like the rest of you and will, in no way, claim to be an expert in or about anything.  I approach these hot topics with the experiences I have and the convictions of my heart and in the direction I believe God is leading me.  I expect nothing less from the people I encounter.  I would rather dialogue any day than to preach even once.

Recently it was reported that 56% of the delegates at the UMC General Conference agreed that God’s grace is available to everyone.  That is a paraphrase, of course, and they were referring to equality of sexuality.  For years the United Methodist Church has been at odds over this issue.  The Book of Discipline Paragraph 161F states, “The United Methodist Church does not condone the practice of homosexuality and considers this practice incompatible with Christian teaching.”  Later in the same Book of Discipline it welcomes all people, regardless of identity, in to the midst of the congregation. 

But what is striking to me about the 2012 General Conference is that the UMC decided that it could not even agree to disagree.  To me, that is one of the basic tenants to relationship whether a loving couple or a family relationship.  My parents taught me this one:  you need to agree that sometimes you are going to disagree with one another.  The UMC could not even state that Christians have different opinions about homosexuality.  They simply refused to enter the language in the record that states that they obviously disagree on the topic of homosexuality, and the role that our GLBT brothers and sisters can/will play in the life of the church. 

I have been in ministry since 1985.  During all of my years I have never been a part of a congregation, Bible study, choir or music program, district or conference event where straight and GLBT brothers and sisters were not all seated together.  They just weren’t supposed to talk about it.  Oddly enough when I attended local, state or national meetings of professional church organists, it was difficult to find heterosexual brothers or sisters.  But I digress… For generations the UMC and many other denominations had refused to talk about the enormous elephant standing in the midst of the congregation.  But in recent years they have been forced to look at it and talk about it.  I recall the year Bishop Sharon Radar, former Bishop of Wisconsin, was presiding over the Annual Conference at which time there was a vote as to whether the Wisconsin Conference of The United Methodist Church would become a ‘welcoming’ congregation – openly accepting gays and lesbians in their midst and in leadership positions.  The vote was astonishingly split 49-51%  The Bishop, in all grace, stood before the gathering and said, “we have agreed that we disagree and therefore we are charged by God and by one another to continue talking about this issue not only among our own side but across the aisles to our brothers and sisters who have a varying opinion”.  She received a standing ovation from almost everyone in the room.  She had the grace to recognize the need for conversation and dialogue. She recognized that we can agree that we disagree on many topics, not just that of sexuality and the Christian life.  Only by talking with one another and sharing our ideas and our hearts; sharing with one another what we feel God has written on our hearts; only then can we even hope to see a glimpse of what God truly wants us to do.  Only then could we even imagine coming together in one accord.  But perhaps that is the idea that God had.  That we would gather together, we would worship together and not all stand on common social ground except the ground that is Christ Jesus.  To open our eyes to the diversity that is God’s earth.

I don’t want you to think I’m lambasting the United Methodist Church.  Like many denominations and faith communities, there is much about the tenants of that particular faith family that is good and godly.  I guess the point I’m trying to make here is that I believe God is waiting to see what we do with our disagreement.  Do we kill the opposition?  Do we shut them out and build walls to keep them out?  Do we stand in the congregation and proclaim that we are so right that our convictions are justifying the persecution of all that oppose us?    Do we pass legislation to limit the opposition in what they can do to or for us?  Do we create names and titles for our opposition?  Do we wholly oppose them or do we reach across the table and take their hands?  Do we pray against one another or with one another?  Do we call upon the God of fire to strike down our opponents in a Holy vengeance or do we call upon the God of the Ages to help us understand and see with new eyes?  Are we just because we are right or are we right just because?  Is it possible to stand in the congregation with such a diverse mixture of the human race and recognize, together, that God is Holy, not us?   That God is on the throne, not us.  That, in the words of Steven Curtis Chapman, ‘God is god and we are not’?  Do we have so much conviction that we now have such a profound loss of who we are and what we are called to do?  Do we set out each day to cause so much pain and anguish for our opposition?  Is our opposition our enemy or our brother?  If our enemy, than we are called to love them, are we not?  If our brother, than how much more are we to love them?  And who among us can truly say we know how to love another human completely, fully and unconditionally? 

Regardless of your convictions concerning homosexuality and the Christian life, we are not the ones who determine our Christianity.  God does that.  No one knows if they will enter the kingdom of heaven but we move forward with the hope and promise of the scriptures and gift of Christ’s sacrifice that there is enough grace to allow us, even one such as I, in to the Kingdom of Heaven.    

As my blog introduction states, I do not claim a denomination or faith-based community other than Christian.  I have been encouraged by some to start a church and by others, to join theirs.  But I hesitate because I do not believe that Christianity is a building.  I believe it is a people and as such we are the church where ever we are gathered.  When we talk about topics of the Holy we are having church. When we share with one another our concerns and our celebrations, we are having church.  When we look to the heavens and behold the beauty and wonder of the night stars – we are at church.  When we hold a baby we have church.  And when we disagree with one another, we are having church.  For we are gathered together, as one family, different colors and lives, seeking one thing:  God’s peace and blessings on what is on our hearts.  When we gather in our buildings and begin spending time on the vision for our signs and our mission statements and the formation of committees – we can lose sight, rather quickly, of why it is we gather.  We gather because we know not.  We gather to share our experiences so that, together, in unity, we may hope that our words and thoughts and actions – indeed our lives, are pleasing to God and that we have done enough during our small visit on this planet to bring as much glory to the Kingdom as is possible by humanity. 

I have seen so much hate on both sides of this issue.  In fact, there is so much venom being spewed from both sides that many people are now refusing to stand on either side.  Christians are afraid to say they are Christian because people will ‘assume’ they hate homosexuals.  Homosexuals are afraid to say they are homosexuals because people will ‘assume’ they hate Christians. 

All of us have multiple labels.  I know a man who is a musician, a singer, an artist, an entrepreneur, a gentle spirit, a wise Christian man, a painter, a homosexual, a lover of art, a wine connoisseur, a pastor, a counselor, a fun person, the life of the party, a jack of all trades and master of none – the list goes on.  The labels keep coming – but the ONLY label that should stand out is one we never use – human.  We are all in this group called humanity.  We are a part of a very large organization of higher thinking, carbon-based life forms.  We are a gift from the Master and He created each and every one of us just a little bit different than the other.  And when you do this to a few billion individuals what you have is the incredible diversity of creation. 

God is constantly creating in us, around us, and through us.  Don’t shut out His creation by looking down at someone simply because they do not walk the same path as you.  They don’t share the same love of music, and they love where their heart leads them not where yours tells them.  We need to spend more time focused on what it means to love one another, what it takes to embrace ALL of humanity, instead of trying to ‘fix’ humanity by making them all appear, act, look, and serve just like we do.